145. Murder to Millions – How to Succeed in Six Months Through Choosing a Few Key Ingredients in Goal Setting with Nelson Tressler the Author of “The Unlucky Sperm Club”

Nelson Tressler is Dr. Brad Miller’s guest on Episode 145 of The Beyond Adversity Podcast. 

Nelson Tressler’s life was sent into a tailspin when in a fit of rage his grandfather murdered a police officer. This was among many adverse life events which devastated Nelson’s personal, professional, and business life.

He talks to Dr. Brad about hitting the bottom in his life and then choosing to make a series of life-altering decisions that transformed his life and led to success in his personal life with a successful marriage and to achieve profound professional success in the world of Real Estate.

His process of choosing not to be defeated by circumstances and instead become a product of your choices.

He outlined his story in his book “The Unlucky Sperm Club: You are Not a Victim of Your Circumstances but a Product of Your Choices.”

He reveals to Dr. Brad the decisions and the process that he now teaches in his process “6 Months 2 Success.” The 6 Months 2 Success Program instills the belief that most people are only a few key ingredients away from being able to fulfill their goals and live the life of their dreams. The I.G.O.T.S.M.A.R.T.E.R.™ Goal Achievement Program gives goal-setters those missing ingredients – making ALL THE DIFFERENCE. The I.G.O.T.S.M.A.R.T.E.R.™ Program not only allows you to know what you truly want, but it gives you the tools, knowledge, and support to actually achieve your goals.

Furthermore, Nelson has created a mobile phone app “The I Got Smarter” app

 https://igotsmarter.com/ which implements the goal elevation process taught in the “6 Months 2 Success” program https://www.6months2success.com/

This is a fascinating story of one of many who was able to navigate personal adversity and achieve success who now offers his experience and teaching to help others achieve their goals in life. 

It’s all about taking consistent positive action and seek to persistently make progress. Don’t ever give up. Nelson shared this quote with Dr. Brad “Never be ashamed of a scar. It simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.”

The Beyond Adversity Podcast is Published weekly by Dr. Brad Miller at DrBradMiller.com for the purpose of helping people navigate adverse life events (death, disease, divorce, depression, debt) and emerge to a life of peace prosperity, and purpose.

Dr. Brad Miller

April 2021

https://www.6months2success.com/

https://igotsmarter.com/

Transcript
Brad Miller:

Dr. Brad Miller here on beyond adversity, where

Brad Miller:

the podcast is helpful to you to overcome adverse conditions in

Brad Miller:

your life. And to come out to a better place a place of peace,

Brad Miller:

prosperity, and purpose. And it's my privilege to have folks

Brad Miller:

to join me on this podcast who have had their own share of

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overcoming and dealing with navigating adverse conditions in

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their life. And to come out to a better place and then to be able

Brad Miller:

to teach you how you could do do likewise such as the case with

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Nelson Tressler, our guest here today he has the process or the

Brad Miller:

course, six months to success, calm the numeral six months,

Brad Miller:

numeral to success, calm and the app the I got smarter.com app

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and in this process, he is going to share with us the the really

Brad Miller:

devastating many ways background that he comes from and his

Brad Miller:

family life and personal life to develop a process where he's

Brad Miller:

been successful in the business world and other aspects of life,

Brad Miller:

and can teach us some things to help you to navigate adverse

Brad Miller:

conditions in your life. And are we Welcome to Beyond adversity.

Brad Miller:

Now. So Tresor, welcome.

.Nelson Tressler:

Thanks for having me, Brad. I appreciate

.Nelson Tressler:

it.

Brad Miller:

Well, it is awesome to have you and just look in

Brad Miller:

your background, you've developed several successful

Brad Miller:

businesses and a process here that folks can connect up with

Brad Miller:

and but it's my observation and reading your story that you

Brad Miller:

really come from just some really, some difficult

Brad Miller:

circumstances in your life. And if you don't mind, I just like

Brad Miller:

for you to take the floor for a few minutes. Nelson to share a

Brad Miller:

little bit of your life story a little bit. What got you to this

Brad Miller:

place today?

.Nelson Tressler:

Sure. Yeah, I've got quite the origin story.

.Nelson Tressler:

My mom became pregnant with me when she was 15 years old. And

.Nelson Tressler:

while she was pregnant with me, her father, who was the local

.Nelson Tressler:

trash collector in a small town, drove into the town square,

.Nelson Tressler:

spotted two police officers stuck a gun out the window and

.Nelson Tressler:

open fire on those police officers killing one and

.Nelson Tressler:

critically wounding another. And eventually, my grandfather was

.Nelson Tressler:

captured and brought to stand trial where he was facing the

.Nelson Tressler:

death penalty. And during his trial, my mom got up and

.Nelson Tressler:

testified to the jury, that the reason that her father had shot

.Nelson Tressler:

and killed that police officer was that that police officer had

.Nelson Tressler:

raped her. And she was now pregnant with his baby, who was

.Nelson Tressler:

me. And my mom's testimony work. My grandfather's first trial

.Nelson Tressler:

ended in a first in a hung jury. The second trial, they took the

.Nelson Tressler:

death penalty off the table. And my grandfather was found guilty

.Nelson Tressler:

and sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of

.Nelson Tressler:

parole, which he ended up spending 40 years in prison. And

.Nelson Tressler:

essentially, you know, went to prison leaving behind his family

.Nelson Tressler:

of 15 children, and including my mom, and now me to kind of live

.Nelson Tressler:

in the wake of, of those consequences. And then, you

.Nelson Tressler:

know,

Brad Miller:

that takes your breath away, right there. Your

Brad Miller:

story, but that there is just like, devastating My goodness.

Brad Miller:

But please continue.

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, I mean, my life didn't get any

.Nelson Tressler:

easier from that, you know, of course, being, you know, having

.Nelson Tressler:

a 15 year old mother. But eventually my mom turned 21. And

.Nelson Tressler:

she met a man who eventually would become my stepfather. But

.Nelson Tressler:

come to find out he was an alcoholic, very emotionally and

.Nelson Tressler:

physically abusive to me and my mom, almost on a daily basis.

.Nelson Tressler:

Eventually, my mom had four more children with my stepfather. And

.Nelson Tressler:

because of the lifestyle that they're, they were living a lot

.Nelson Tressler:

of the basic needs, and my siblings fell upon me as the

.Nelson Tressler:

oldest. My mom would, would rather me stay home and help

.Nelson Tressler:

with the kids instead of go to school and, and I hated school.

.Nelson Tressler:

You know, and I remember it my fourth grade year of looking

.Nelson Tressler:

down at my report card and seeing that I had strayed F's

.Nelson Tressler:

and that I would be repeating the fourth grade. And I probably

.Nelson Tressler:

missed 50 or 60 days of school that year. I couldn't read, I

.Nelson Tressler:

couldn't write, I can't spell. And the following year, they

.Nelson Tressler:

placed me into special ed to try to get the help that I needed.

.Nelson Tressler:

And so that's kind of where my schooling went. And then

.Nelson Tressler:

eventually, one day my stepfather was walking home

.Nelson Tressler:

drunk from a bar. There was somebody else who was driving

.Nelson Tressler:

home drunk from that bar and ended up hitting and killing

.Nelson Tressler:

him. And it was at this time that my mom, she has five kids

.Nelson Tressler:

now. My youngest sister was just born. I think she's three or

.Nelson Tressler:

four months at this at time, but as hard as my mom's life has

.Nelson Tressler:

been to this point, you know, losing my stepfather no matter

.Nelson Tressler:

how abusive he was left my mom, really with no hope. My mom had

.Nelson Tressler:

dropped out of school in the eighth grade, she had never

.Nelson Tressler:

worked outside of the home. And here she is left alone to raise

.Nelson Tressler:

five small children. And it's at this time that she decides that

.Nelson Tressler:

she can't do it, and that she attempt suicide. And

.Nelson Tressler:

fortunately, she was not successful. But whenever she was

.Nelson Tressler:

released from the hospital, it was at this time that she

.Nelson Tressler:

decided she couldn't care for all five of us on our own. And

.Nelson Tressler:

that's when I went to go live with my grandmother who is the

.Nelson Tressler:

wife of the man who shot and killed the police officer. And

.Nelson Tressler:

as I said, she has 15 children, some of those children are still

.Nelson Tressler:

living at home, when I go to live with her. And because my

.Nelson Tressler:

grandma was a saint, she was also raising four or five other

.Nelson Tressler:

grandchildren at the time for various reasons. And so I go to

.Nelson Tressler:

live with her. And for the first time, I don't have to worry

.Nelson Tressler:

about somebody coming home drunk and beating me or my mom, I

.Nelson Tressler:

don't have to worry about waking up to take care of babies and

.Nelson Tressler:

2am feedings. And the one role that my grandma did have is she,

.Nelson Tressler:

she wasn't high on education. But the one thing that she did

.Nelson Tressler:

expect was that you were going to go to school, and and that

.Nelson Tressler:

was probably for her own sake, you know, having 15 kids, that's

.Nelson Tressler:

probably your only break is when your kids go to school. So I

.Nelson Tressler:

started to go to school on a regular basis. And I started to

.Nelson Tressler:

kind of reflect upon my life and the direction that it was going.

.Nelson Tressler:

And then one day, a counselor from the local university came

.Nelson Tressler:

to our school, and we had an assembly and she kind of talked

.Nelson Tressler:

about the things that you needed to do to get into college. And

.Nelson Tressler:

for the first time, I started to think, you know, what, what if I

.Nelson Tressler:

can go to college, and, you know, I thought at the time that

.Nelson Tressler:

would solve all of my problems. And you know, what it's like,

.Nelson Tressler:

whenever you set a goal, or you start to think of something

.Nelson Tressler:

that's going to be hard, that voice in the back of your head,

.Nelson Tressler:

starts to scream at you all the reasons that you shouldn't even

.Nelson Tressler:

think about doing that. And I remember thinking, you know,

.Nelson Tressler:

Nelson, you're in special ed, you can't read, you can't write,

.Nelson Tressler:

you can't spell of my mom's family of those 15 children,

.Nelson Tressler:

only two had ever graduated from high school. And, you know, I

.Nelson Tressler:

started thinking to myself, Nelson, you're gonna be lucky to

.Nelson Tressler:

graduate high school, let alone go to college. But, you know, I

.Nelson Tressler:

saw where my life was heading. And this was the one thing that

.Nelson Tressler:

I could kind of focus on to see a better future for myself. So

.Nelson Tressler:

from that day on, I started to kind of do the things that I

.Nelson Tressler:

thought I needed to do, that would get me to college, and 12

.Nelson Tressler:

years after that, four different universities, fours in, in the

.Nelson Tressler:

Air Force to get money to go to school, eventually became that

.Nelson Tressler:

first person in my family to graduate from college, and get

.Nelson Tressler:

that college degree.

Brad Miller:

What a powerful witness to a devastating life

Brad Miller:

growing up, and then making the influence of a person in your

Brad Miller:

life and then making a really life changing decision about

Brad Miller:

college. And given your background, a lot of people get

Brad Miller:

stuck there. Nelson, you know, people get stuck into

Brad Miller:

circumstances you were talking about and don't make it out. And

Brad Miller:

you did. And you've had some success in the business world.

Brad Miller:

And before we go a little bit further and your, your story,

Brad Miller:

just tell us a little bit about what types of businesses you've

Brad Miller:

been involved with, and how, what what the point I want to

Brad Miller:

make is that you've evolved out of college into having some

Brad Miller:

success in your life. So tell us a bit about what type of things

Brad Miller:

you've been involved with.

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, so I was fortunate enough to get a

.Nelson Tressler:

job right out of college in the commercial in commercial real

.Nelson Tressler:

estate industry. And I've done that for the last 20 years. And

.Nelson Tressler:

it was fortunate enough to become the top salesman in the

.Nelson Tressler:

in the retail division worldwide for a top five firm, multiple

.Nelson Tressler:

times. So I've had some great success there. I've also started

.Nelson Tressler:

other businesses, I've started children's daycare center in Las

.Nelson Tressler:

Vegas and built that to one of the largest chains in Las Vegas.

.Nelson Tressler:

And then was also fortunate enough to build one of the

.Nelson Tressler:

largest pet resort chains in the country, you know, privately

.Nelson Tressler:

held pet resort chains in the country, and was able to sell

.Nelson Tressler:

both of those businesses. And you get to that point in your

.Nelson Tressler:

life. You know, I don't ever envision myself propping my feet

.Nelson Tressler:

up and and watching sunsets. That's just not in my DNA. And

.Nelson Tressler:

so I was thinking, Okay, what do I want to do with the rest of my

.Nelson Tressler:

life? And for the longest time, that story that I just told the

.Nelson Tressler:

only person who knew that story Was my wife, I ran from that

.Nelson Tressler:

story, I joined the Air Force to get out of that small town I

.Nelson Tressler:

never, you know, went back, I've gone back to that small town,

.Nelson Tressler:

but I never went back there to live because of everything that

.Nelson Tressler:

kinda I had to go through. And I talk a lot about that in my book

.Nelson Tressler:

beyond lucky sperm club. And now that you guys know my story, you

.Nelson Tressler:

kind of know where that title came from. But nobody knew about

.Nelson Tressler:

that. Those circumstances, none of my friends not even like my

.Nelson Tressler:

children, because I had run from it, it weaken me to think about

.Nelson Tressler:

that. And I started to kind of reflect Why did I live that type

.Nelson Tressler:

of life? Why was I placed into those circumstances. And I came

.Nelson Tressler:

up with, you know, the reason that I was there, I made it out

.Nelson Tressler:

of that. I've been able to overcome those circumstances.

.Nelson Tressler:

And I became obsessed with goals and personal development after

.Nelson Tressler:

that first big goal of graduating from college. And I

.Nelson Tressler:

determined at that time that I was wanted to spend the rest of

.Nelson Tressler:

my life to help other people realize that they're not a

.Nelson Tressler:

victim of their circumstances, that they're a product of their

.Nelson Tressler:

choices. And I started the new business, I got smarter, which

.Nelson Tressler:

is an app. And it's the program that I've kind of perfected over

.Nelson Tressler:

the last 20 years, as I've, you know, worked on goals and worked

.Nelson Tressler:

on personal development and becoming a better version of

.Nelson Tressler:

myself, I saw where I failed at goals and where I needed to a

.Nelson Tressler:

little bit of help. And the program that's out there with I

.Nelson Tressler:

got smarter. Essentially, patches, all those holes in

.Nelson Tressler:

helps people fulfill their their dreams and their goals. Because

.Nelson Tressler:

the one thing I realize is we don't have a knowledge problem.

.Nelson Tressler:

When it comes to fulfilling our goals. We know what we need to

.Nelson Tressler:

do, we have an execution problem, we just don't do what

.Nelson Tressler:

we know we need to do. And that's what I got smarter does

.Nelson Tressler:

is it helps you do the things that you know you need to do

.Nelson Tressler:

when you need to do them. Yeah,

Brad Miller:

very good. Because what you said to them, I think

Brad Miller:

is so key there, you've you made some choices that led to some

Brad Miller:

new directions in your life. And now you're looking to make some

Brad Miller:

choices to view contributor to other persons to help them to

Brad Miller:

implement these areas. And we're bombarded by knowledge all the

Brad Miller:

time. And most people have at least a sensibility about, about

Brad Miller:

what it takes, you know, for instance, are you given when

Brad Miller:

people talk about New Year's resolutions and so on goal

Brad Miller:

setting above the basic ones are weight loss, and you know, make

Brad Miller:

more money and to have better relationships. And yet, many

Brad Miller:

people, you know, by the time February rolls around, they have

Brad Miller:

fallen off and all those things are overeating, their

Brad Miller:

relationships are still messed up and then move deeper in debt.

Brad Miller:

And yet, so they know what to do, but they don't do it. So

Brad Miller:

what you're sharing with is, is the actions to take and has to

Brad Miller:

go with those choices. And, and I'm curious here for out of your

Brad Miller:

own life, and then what you teach in your, in your in your

Brad Miller:

courses, and in your app and your your application process.

Brad Miller:

Let's talk a bit more about this area of choices. I like to call

Brad Miller:

it bold actions, because I think they have to break a pattern,

Brad Miller:

you know, we have to break our pattern of where we are kind of

Brad Miller:

stuck in some areas, people People often use that

Brad Miller:

terminology of being stuck on kind of stuck on my life on the

Brad Miller:

grid, we're spinning my wheels and so on. What would you say

Brad Miller:

are some of the dramatic bold choices that you took and that

Brad Miller:

you advocate people take to break these patterns?

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, I think it all comes down to

.Nelson Tressler:

choice. And in my book, The on lucky sperm club, I talk about

.Nelson Tressler:

kind of the hand that worked out and I look at that is a lot of

.Nelson Tressler:

people feel like they've been dealt Erol hand whether it be at

.Nelson Tressler:

birth, or whether they what circumstances they find

.Nelson Tressler:

themselves in now. And what I talk about is the one the one

.Nelson Tressler:

way, you know, in poker, you only get you know, to discard

.Nelson Tressler:

your cards one time, and then that's the hand you're stuck

.Nelson Tressler:

with. But life is just like that. The only difference is is

.Nelson Tressler:

life, you get to discard your hand as many times as you want

.Nelson Tressler:

if you don't like your hand and the way that you do that is

.Nelson Tressler:

through the choices that you make. If you want different

.Nelson Tressler:

circumstances, what you need to do is start making different

.Nelson Tressler:

choices. And the problem I think that a lot of people have when

.Nelson Tressler:

it comes to choices is they want everything to be perfect before

.Nelson Tressler:

they make that choice. They want all those traffic lights to be

.Nelson Tressler:

green before they head down there, you know on their journey

.Nelson Tressler:

and and that almost never happens. So what we advocate is

.Nelson Tressler:

take that first step don't wait for all the lights to turn

.Nelson Tressler:

green. Chances are you know what one choice you need to start

.Nelson Tressler:

making today. That will get you closer to where you want to be.

.Nelson Tressler:

And what whether that's weight loss, whether that's your

.Nelson Tressler:

relationship, whether it's financial, those three key

.Nelson Tressler:

points that you touched on, we all know what that first step

.Nelson Tressler:

can be. In a lot of times what it's like is it's like walking

.Nelson Tressler:

through fog is you can't see but maybe two or three feet in front

.Nelson Tressler:

of you and thick fog, but when you take that first step you You

.Nelson Tressler:

can see two or three feet further, and you take another

.Nelson Tressler:

step you can see. And that's what happens when you act now

.Nelson Tressler:

and you make those choices is you might not know exactly what

.Nelson Tressler:

needs to happen next week or next month. But as you continue

.Nelson Tressler:

to make those choices, that vision opens up to you. And all

.Nelson Tressler:

you have to do is keep making those correct choices. And, you

.Nelson Tressler:

know, your life will drastically go in the direction that you're

.Nelson Tressler:

making those correct choices to do.

Brad Miller:

But nothing happens if we stay still. And we have to

Brad Miller:

choose a direction and take some steps forward. Even if we have

Brad Miller:

to alter the direction you got to keep moving. That's part of

Brad Miller:

what I think in my life, you got to keep moving, keep going. So

.Nelson Tressler:

yeah, and we also need to realize that

.Nelson Tressler:

we're not looking for perfection here, none of us are going to

.Nelson Tressler:

live a perfect life. We're looking for progress. And if we

.Nelson Tressler:

have that mindset, that you know what I know, I'm going to fail,

.Nelson Tressler:

I know I'm not going to be perfect. I know I'm not going

.Nelson Tressler:

to, you know, do absolutely everything that I can do. But,

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, tomorrow, I'm going to be a little bit further ahead or

.Nelson Tressler:

a little bit closer to where I want to be. And next week, I'm

.Nelson Tressler:

going to be even closer next month, I'm going to be closer,

.Nelson Tressler:

is it going to be a perfect month? Probably not. But we need

.Nelson Tressler:

to have that long term perspective, we kind of talked

.Nelson Tressler:

about goals, and we talked about that in our program is those

.Nelson Tressler:

people who are successful in life, they have that long term

.Nelson Tressler:

perspective, they see where they want to be next month, next year

.Nelson Tressler:

and five years and 10 years, and they realize that it is a

.Nelson Tressler:

process. And they realize that there's going to be abin flows

.Nelson Tressler:

and peaks and valleys, but they know where they want to be in

.Nelson Tressler:

that long term. Yeah,

Brad Miller:

progress over perfection is a part of what I

Brad Miller:

teach as well, I love that it's a part of your of your process

Brad Miller:

as well. And you you did mention something there Nelson, I found

Brad Miller:

very interesting, you talked about you know about the fog and

Brad Miller:

about the putting one step in front of another and how you're

Brad Miller:

not going to have airbelt you're not every, every brick of yellow

Brad Miller:

brick road is always going to be lined up in front of you never

Brad Miller:

signed it in front of you. But we have to take a step. And I'd

Brad Miller:

like to stones call that a step of faith or you know, going out

Brad Miller:

into the unknown, taking a risk risk, and you kind of get your

Brad Miller:

ROI involved, what your what your I mean, your your your risk

Brad Miller:

reward is what I'm trying to say not so much ROI. But let's talk

Brad Miller:

a little bit about about that process is any part of your

Brad Miller:

process you're dealing with, you're talking about here

Brad Miller:

involves some sort of a sense of drawing on a power higher than

Brad Miller:

yourself, you know, that sometimes we have the inner

Brad Miller:

life, which helps drives us with tons of we need to draw

Brad Miller:

resources. And for some folks, that's religion, some folks

Brad Miller:

that's meditation, some folks that some other form of

Brad Miller:

emotional support, is any part of your process involves a

Brad Miller:

calling upon a greater power to empower you.

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, I'm a very spiritual person and have a

.Nelson Tressler:

strong faith. But I allow people you know, in that program, you

.Nelson Tressler:

know, that's a hot button. And some people want that in their

.Nelson Tressler:

lives, and some people don't, I wanted in my life, I have it in

.Nelson Tressler:

my life, I feel like it's a huge impact in my life. And I again,

.Nelson Tressler:

I talk about my conversion story in my book, The on lucky sperm

.Nelson Tressler:

club. But in our program, what we allow you to do, and I think

.Nelson Tressler:

this is one thing that's very unique, and helps tons of people

.Nelson Tressler:

is we allow people to invite what we call a success partner

.Nelson Tressler:

through the app. And in that app, you see real time what your

.Nelson Tressler:

success partner is doing. In the program, we have what we call a

.Nelson Tressler:

morning ritual, and a more a morning routine. And that's

.Nelson Tressler:

going through and we give gratitude every single day, we

.Nelson Tressler:

review our goals every day, we learn success principles every

.Nelson Tressler:

day. And then we kind of figure out what we need to do every day

.Nelson Tressler:

for our three goals that we're working on. And when you finish

.Nelson Tressler:

that morning routine, your success partner gets an alert

.Nelson Tressler:

that says, hey, Nelson finished his morning routine. And Brad,

.Nelson Tressler:

if you and I are partners. Now you can say kudos to me and

.Nelson Tressler:

communicate with me through the app. But what that also says is

.Nelson Tressler:

Brad, if you didn't do your morning routine, Oh, I got to

.Nelson Tressler:

get mine done because Nelson gets it done. And what we found

.Nelson Tressler:

is you're 95% more likely to follow through and do the things

.Nelson Tressler:

that you said you're going to do if you have that success partner

.Nelson Tressler:

who's there in the trenches with you, helping you and supporting

.Nelson Tressler:

you to see it through to the end, and you're also there for

.Nelson Tressler:

them. So it's that mutual benefit of you guys are in those

.Nelson Tressler:

trenches together working towards those goals.

Brad Miller:

So it holds you accountable and builds community

Brad Miller:

builds a important personal relationship. It's not just some

Brad Miller:

sort of a paper planner or electronic Gizmo. I mean, it

Brad Miller:

involves an app on your phone. I know but but it involves people

Brad Miller:

to read what I wanted to get with you I I just have a real

Brad Miller:

belief that powerful relay ships are what fuel life change, you

Brad Miller:

know, we have to be given some emotional up, you know emotional

Brad Miller:

energy that comes from relationships. And just like you

Brad Miller:

to say more about that either in your own personal life, you know

Brad Miller:

how that was impactful to get you to where you got, you know,

Brad Miller:

you, you mentioned some really challenging negative

Brad Miller:

relationships that you had to overcome. But I think for a lot

Brad Miller:

of us, we can be fueled by positive relationships and

Brad Miller:

Nandan. Any more you want to say about how that is implemented,

Brad Miller:

then in your program?

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, I mean, I think you look at

.Nelson Tressler:

anybody that you look at and feel like they're successful.

.Nelson Tressler:

And I guarantee you, they, they didn't do it alone, none of us

.Nelson Tressler:

do it alone, we always have that support network, those people

.Nelson Tressler:

who are encouraging us, those mentors that are kind of showing

.Nelson Tressler:

us the way, but I'll tell you, when when I was young, I didn't

.Nelson Tressler:

have a lot of mentors or a lot of positive role models. And the

.Nelson Tressler:

one thing that I did was, I didn't really know where I

.Nelson Tressler:

wanted to go. But I knew absolutely where I didn't want

.Nelson Tressler:

to end up. And I kind of did the things that I needed to do to

.Nelson Tressler:

get away from that. So if you feel like you don't have those

.Nelson Tressler:

positive role models in your life, start making those

.Nelson Tressler:

choices, to get away from where you want to be. And I think a

.Nelson Tressler:

lot of people get hung up on that, because they don't have

.Nelson Tressler:

that positive role model in their lives, they really don't

.Nelson Tressler:

have that person to look at and try to mirror their their

.Nelson Tressler:

movements and their actions. But just make those those actions

.Nelson Tressler:

and those choices to get away from what you know, you don't

.Nelson Tressler:

want to do. But But in our program, yes, we have a

.Nelson Tressler:

community that you're going to be like the people that you hang

.Nelson Tressler:

out with, I mean, there's been all kinds of studies about that,

.Nelson Tressler:

that your incomes going to be the average of the five people

.Nelson Tressler:

that you hang out with your mental abilities are going to be

.Nelson Tressler:

the the five people that you spend the most time with. So

.Nelson Tressler:

community is so important. And you need to get into that good

.Nelson Tressler:

community that shares the same values and the same standards

.Nelson Tressler:

and the same, you know, aspirations that you have. And

.Nelson Tressler:

what you find is that community, kind of the tide raises all

.Nelson Tressler:

ships, when you get in that right community, and you start

.Nelson Tressler:

surrounding yourself with like minded people, what you'll find

.Nelson Tressler:

is that energizes you and gives you those emotions that you need

.Nelson Tressler:

to get through those tough days. So I would absolutely stress

.Nelson Tressler:

that everybody find a community, wherever that is, whether it's

.Nelson Tressler:

in person, you know, which is a tough thing to do now with the

.Nelson Tressler:

pandemic. But you know, there's tons of online communities. I

.Nelson Tressler:

mean, we have our community at I got smarter, and Nelson

.Nelson Tressler:

Tressler. And just huge benefits from that, and I couldn't stress

.Nelson Tressler:

it enough. You

Brad Miller:

know, the part of that process of building

Brad Miller:

community is, you know, there's the interpersonal ones that you

Brad Miller:

mentioned, which are important. And sometimes that can be family

Brad Miller:

or other communities, you could be even, you know, the guys you

Brad Miller:

play basketball with at the Y or whatever, this kind of thing.

Brad Miller:

But it also can even be, I believe, even virtually not only

Brad Miller:

through Facebook groups, that kind of thing, but even through

Brad Miller:

great books, and through things like that, and through tape

Brad Miller:

programs, and maybe a program such as yours, where you can

Brad Miller:

start to be inspired by the work of others and speak into your

Brad Miller:

life. And I just think it's important that we build these

Brad Miller:

relationships, and implement them. And that's what I want to

Brad Miller:

talk to you about now is the implementation part of it.

Brad Miller:

Because I think as you mentioned here, Nelson, that is a part

Brad Miller:

that is a unique approach that you have, in many ways to many

Brad Miller:

other kind of life planning or processes that you know, there's

Brad Miller:

lots of goal setting type of books and processes there. I've

Brad Miller:

been through much of myself, and as well as apparently you have

Brad Miller:

as you've been developing. Let's talk about the implementation

Brad Miller:

piece. And what I told you about is, you mentioned a morning

Brad Miller:

routine and an evening routine and how the accountability

Brad Miller:

piece, let's talk about discipline, about habits about

Brad Miller:

the cognitive piece, how you imprint this on yourself,

Brad Miller:

because what we do know, my own experience and others is that

Brad Miller:

oftentimes we talk about goal setting and things like that.

Brad Miller:

And we are able to go with it for a while, but then it gets

Brad Miller:

hard and it drops off. Tell me what, tell me about the

Brad Miller:

disciplines, habits, processes procedure, the cognitive part

Brad Miller:

about your program about what you believe.

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, so the first part of our program we

.Nelson Tressler:

call our self assessment, and that's about getting crystal

.Nelson Tressler:

clear on really what you want in life. And I think that's one of

.Nelson Tressler:

the major issues when people fail with their goals. And, and

.Nelson Tressler:

we're not talking we're talking 95% of people fail at their

.Nelson Tressler:

goals within the first couple months. So if you feel like you

.Nelson Tressler:

haven't done well with goals, you're not alone and that's why

.Nelson Tressler:

I saw I need for, you know, this program I got smarter. But we,

.Nelson Tressler:

we become crystal clear on what we want, we also become crystal

.Nelson Tressler:

clear on what we're going to have to do to achieve that goal.

.Nelson Tressler:

And a lot of people think that they want to be wealthy. But

.Nelson Tressler:

what they realize is that they're not willing to either,

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, sacrifice their relationships, if it's going to

.Nelson Tressler:

take that sacrifice their health, if it's going to take

.Nelson Tressler:

that. So we make sure one you know what you you want, and then

.Nelson Tressler:

to you understand the price that you're going to have to pay for

.Nelson Tressler:

that. And then there's a lot of things that we've baked into our

.Nelson Tressler:

program to help you every single goal that we have has a self

.Nelson Tressler:

imposed positive reward, as well as a self imposed negative

.Nelson Tressler:

consequence that you're going to do whether or not you meet that

.Nelson Tressler:

goal, and your your success partner can help you stay

.Nelson Tressler:

accountable to that. But a lot of our minds, we either run

.Nelson Tressler:

towards pleasure, or we run away from fears or discomfort. So

.Nelson Tressler:

we've built that into the program. And, you know, it can

.Nelson Tressler:

be fun things like you know, what if if I'm not able to get

.Nelson Tressler:

to my target, wait, I'm going to dress up in a leotard and sing,

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, girls want to have fun on my Facebook page and post it,

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, so there's things like that, we also go as far as

.Nelson Tressler:

allowing your success partner to jump in there and put in and

.Nelson Tressler:

also a negative consequence, if you are not able to reach it.

.Nelson Tressler:

And you might be willing to kind of let yourself down and say,

.Nelson Tressler:

You know what, I'll just get on YouTube and saying, you know, I

.Nelson Tressler:

don't want to do it, but, but if I'm, if I'm willing to put my

.Nelson Tressler:

neck on the line that you're going to meet this, chances are,

.Nelson Tressler:

you're going to do everything that you can to make sure that I

.Nelson Tressler:

don't have to follow through with my consequence. So we've

.Nelson Tressler:

baked those things into it. I think another problem with a lot

.Nelson Tressler:

of programs out there is they have annual thinking, they want

.Nelson Tressler:

to set a goal for what you're going to do next year or five

.Nelson Tressler:

years from now. And our minds don't wrap around those things.

.Nelson Tressler:

There's not that sense of urgency. And then we've all just

.Nelson Tressler:got through:.Nelson Tressler:

a year or a few months. So what we've done in I got smarter is

.Nelson Tressler:

we have huge goals, goals that are going to take years and five

.Nelson Tressler:

years and 10 years. But what we do is we break every goal down

.Nelson Tressler:

into a 30 day sprint. And we work on those goals in small

.Nelson Tressler:

bite sized pieces. And then we we evaluate and then we readjust

.Nelson Tressler:

every 30 days. And your mind really knows what it needs to do

.Nelson Tressler:

to hit that goal in 30 days from now. And if something comes up,

.Nelson Tressler:

in our program, people aren't throwing up their hands and

.Nelson Tressler:

giving up until next New Year's, they they're looking at that 30

.Nelson Tressler:

day sprint, they've either done well, or they haven't done well.

.Nelson Tressler:

But then you have that option to evaluate. And then you have

.Nelson Tressler:

that, you know that responsibility to kind of

.Nelson Tressler:

readjust and go at it again without losing months or even

.Nelson Tressler:

years at a time.

Brad Miller:

Yeah, there's I think he made some really

Brad Miller:

interesting points there. And I just kind of thinking about some

Brad Miller:

phrases that I've kind of used my own life. And one of them is

Brad Miller:

the Christmas planning panic, which he recalls Christmas rolls

Brad Miller:

around. And you realize you have some panic in your life about

Brad Miller:

several areas. Sometimes it's about I haven't done my

Brad Miller:

Christmas shopping or whatever, that kind of stuff, it also has

Brad Miller:

to do with I just haven't accomplished what I thought I

Brad Miller:

would and you try to get it all done. And you know, the last

Brad Miller:

party super just doesn't work that way. Because you've let

Brad Miller:

things go too much. And that's goes to the other piece of

Brad Miller:

things that is you, as I've sometimes termed it, the

Brad Miller:

Comfortably Numb club, where you just kind of stay stuck. And

Brad Miller:

you're just kind of numb and you just kind of zone out whether

Brad Miller:

it's watching TV or internet or whatever. And you don't take the

Brad Miller:

action and you have live with regret and remorse and all those

Brad Miller:

things and, and too many people are stuck there. And I think

Brad Miller:this past year:Brad Miller:

themselves in this pandemic situation where all of a sudden

Brad Miller:

your life hit them like a ton of bricks. Some people responded by

Brad Miller:

saying Okay, I'm going to take this time and do something with

Brad Miller:

it. Other people just were kind of just kind of shocked into

Brad Miller:

numbness again. And what I'm hearing you say here is there's

Brad Miller:

practices and processes that you can implement with your program

Brad Miller:

that can help us to do that. And I'd like to see talk to you now

Brad Miller:

for distributor to about the evidence of that. What I mean by

Brad Miller:

that is you've got this just your program six months to

Brad Miller:

success, the I got smarter app, and your your book. So that

Brad Miller:

means that you've probably got some new people who have

Brad Miller:

impacted in your programs and that is like to hear a little

Brad Miller:

bit about either success or a story or stories about some of

Brad Miller:

the folks who have implemented your process and how it made

Brad Miller:

some difference to them. Do you have a good story for us?

.Nelson Tressler:

Oh yeah. Yeah, there, there was a

.Nelson Tressler:

gentleman who joined our program. He had been unemployed

.Nelson Tressler:

for maybe nine, maybe 10 months. And this was, this wasn't this

.Nelson Tressler:

year, this was the previous years, struggled, was depressed,

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, just was not in a good place really in any area of his

.Nelson Tressler:

life, and joined our program, got the support came to the

.Nelson Tressler:

community, really dug in for the first time, and determined what

.Nelson Tressler:

he wanted with his life want, what he wanted with his goals,

.Nelson Tressler:

and was able to, you know, within, within three months, he

.Nelson Tressler:

found like his dream job, he had lost like 15 or 20 pounds, the

.Nelson Tressler:

relationships that, you know, at his family level, were better

.Nelson Tressler:

than they had been in, you know, a decade. And all that was is he

.Nelson Tressler:

just started to live life with focus again. And what he

.Nelson Tressler:

realized was, again, you know, with my book, he wasn't a victim

.Nelson Tressler:

of his circumstances he was, he was a product of the choices

.Nelson Tressler:

that he started to make. And what he started to do was, as

.Nelson Tressler:

he, as he kind of got through the program, and every day that

.Nelson Tressler:

he put behind him, he started to build up that momentum. And he

.Nelson Tressler:

started to believe in himself. And he started to realize that

.Nelson Tressler:

he was in control. And I think a lot of times people, they feel

.Nelson Tressler:

like, the reason that life is hard for them has been because

.Nelson Tressler:

of outside forces. And as soon as we start assigning our

.Nelson Tressler:

problems, our issues, our happiness, to outside forces, we

.Nelson Tressler:

give away all that control, because there's nothing that we

.Nelson Tressler:

can do if we're assigning it to other people, places or things.

.Nelson Tressler:

And as soon as he took responsibility for his happiness

.Nelson Tressler:

for his goals, and for his life, and he realized that he was in

.Nelson Tressler:

charge, that's when he started to build that momentum. And, you

.Nelson Tressler:

know, it's been over a year now, and his life is drastically

.Nelson Tressler:

different. And his health is better than it's been in two

.Nelson Tressler:

decades, his relationships are better than they've been in a

.Nelson Tressler:

long time. And he's, you know, still working at a job that he

.Nelson Tressler:

loves and loves to go to every day. Awesome. Awesome. That's

Brad Miller:

good. Great to hear. And that raised me around

Brad Miller:

to what I wanted us to focus in now on the folks who may be

Brad Miller:

listening to our voices here today. And you know, target of

Brad Miller:

what beyond adversity about is about helping people who have

Brad Miller:

experienced some adverse conditions and help them to come

Brad Miller:

out a better place I like to call it peace, prosperity and

Brad Miller:

purpose. But you provide us some tools and resources, of course,

Brad Miller:

and book and so on. So what are people going to find? Let's say

Brad Miller:

there is someone who's kind of stuck, or they're in that numb

Brad Miller:

place. And they've heard your story now, what are they going

Brad Miller:

to find it your websites and on your app that they can apply to

Brad Miller:

their life?

.Nelson Tressler:

Yeah, I think you know, my book, the

.Nelson Tressler:

unlucky sperm club, you're, you're not a victim of your

.Nelson Tressler:

circumstances, but a product of your choices, I think that's a

.Nelson Tressler:

great place to start. Because I think that kind of jerks a lot

.Nelson Tressler:

of people out of that victim mindset that they're stuck in.

.Nelson Tressler:

And they realize that there's people who are out there and

.Nelson Tressler:

very hard situations that figure out a way to do it. So I think,

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, the book is going to give you some inspiration, some

.Nelson Tressler:

motivation. And then the program and the app I got smarter is

.Nelson Tressler:

going to give you that plan that's going to give you that

.Nelson Tressler:

program, it's going to give you that the knowledge and the

.Nelson Tressler:

support, and the tools to finally follow through with what

.Nelson Tressler:

you know you need to do in order to accomplish your goals. And in

.Nelson Tressler:

that community will encourage you to stick with it. Because

.Nelson Tressler:

success is not an event. And I think a lot of people feel like

.Nelson Tressler:

you know, if I just make it here, everything's going to be

.Nelson Tressler:

better. Success is not an event. It's a journey. And in fact,

.Nelson Tressler:

success is a journey that never ends, we're always should be

.Nelson Tressler:

striving to become that better version of ourselves. Because in

.Nelson Tressler:

our program, the AI stands for the individual, you know, that

.Nelson Tressler:

person staring back at you in the mirror every single day.

.Nelson Tressler:

Everything in your life will you know reflect what type of person

.Nelson Tressler:

you are, what type of choices you're making, and what type of

.Nelson Tressler:

person you're becoming. And we start with that and everything

.Nelson Tressler:

kind of funnels to that person. That's what we're constantly

.Nelson Tressler:

working on. Because the only way that you're going to achieve

.Nelson Tressler:

those goals is that you're going to become the person who can

.Nelson Tressler:

achieve those goals. So we're always working on that person,

.Nelson Tressler:

that individual Awesome.

Brad Miller:

Well, you've heard it here now folks. The good

Brad Miller:

people have DB audit versity audience that and Elsa Trusler

Brad Miller:

has some things to offer to you and you can find him at I got

Brad Miller:

smarter, calm, that's the app and six months To success.com

Brad Miller:

and it's been our pleasure here today on beyond adversity to

The Beyond Adversity Podcast has the mission to help people navigate adverse life events and emerge victorious to live a life of peace, prosperity, and purpose.