How Women of Abuse Can Get to a Better and Healthier Mindset of “Be, Do, Have a SASSI Spirit That Ruffles Some Feathers and Blows Some Minds!” with International Advocate for Women Against Abuse Christine Malek the Creator of the SASSI Method

Christine was abused and subjected to domestic violence. She has bruises all over her body due to her physical trauma.

She survived all the physical traumas, but the emotional, psychological, and verbal damage she endured will not be erased and will take much longer to recover.

Christine discussed how she overcame abuse and found her voice to speak up and bring her experiences to light, letting people know that abuse and domestic violence are still widespread.

She discusses how her life was a violent circle of abuse, how she became an alcoholic and drug addict, and her suicide attempts.

As someone who has survived many life-threatening situations, she feels her angels are the ones who saved her and are why she is still alive today.

Christine Malek tells Dr. Brad about how she found her way back to God, pleading for forgiveness and asking God to take away her sorrow.

Christine also discusses her encounter with an orb of light that made her feel loved and led her to believe it was God.

Christine Malek’s story is a compelling, spiritual, and transformational testimonial to someone who has walked the path of overcoming adversity and emerging to live a life of peace, prosperity, and purpose.

Episode 162 of The Beyond Adversity Podcast is a must-listen for anyone who has experienced life-threatening moments, abuse, and domestic violence and is looking for a will to continue living and get past their traumas.

“The Beyond Adversity Podcast with Dr. Brad Miller is published weekly with the mission of helping people “Grow Through What They Go Through” as they navigate adversity and discover their promised life of peace, prosperity and purpose. 

https://sassicoach.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SASSICoachChristine/ 

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christine-malek-32347811/ 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christine_consulting/

Transcript

[00:00:00] Christine Malek:

Because I cannot be with anyone until I love myself, and of course, I do. I've gotten to that point.

[00:00:14] Brad Miller:

Let's, let's go there. What are some things you're doing now to express love for yourself? Appreciate yourself. Cause when you're in an abusive situation, you know, you know this much better than I do, but it's the basic context is you are put down.

It is an oppressed relationship. Totally. Where you are made to not only. Physically beat down, but emotionally and spiritually beat down so that you're less than. So now you've done some things to be, to grow and to be more, and to step up. We're going to talk about your program here in a second, which is all about being SASSI, which the whole, the whole vibe of SASSI is, you know, I got a little bit of an attitude here, that kind of a thing.

So tell us what you're doing now for you, and then we'll get a minute of how that is helping other people.

[00:00:58] Christine Malek:

I take the time for. I love nature, so I get out in nature, and it never fails. Every time I go out in nature, I will see a white feather representing my angels being there.

A butterfly will come in and land on me. I drink water. The body is made up of basically mind, body, and soul. We know this, so we have to nourish our minds. We have to have good, positive thoughts in our minds. The. We have to nourish the body with healthy foods. I'm not advocating for totally organic.

I love my chocolate, but I keep it in, in, and in little increments here and there. I don't, I don't refuse myself. Some of those. Those nice things, those things that mean a lot to me. So I try and take care of my body. I try and put good healthy foods and drinks in my body along with good, healthy thoughts going in my body.

And, of course, I nourish my soul. Not only am I a coach, but I have a spiritual coach that keeps me grounded. Yeah. Keeps me when I do have those moments, okay? Where is my brain going, I'm not having really good thoughts today, and I can call her and DM her, and she'll go, okay, Christine, take a deep breath, take a step back.

[00:02:17] Brad Miller:

Christie, some of the practical acts as fast. You're taking care of your physical health and connecting with nature. You have a coach, and you're also connecting with others in coaching. Yes. And so what it's, and so when you do that, you begin to replace some of the toxic nature of your past relationships or the toxic nature of dependence on alcohol or anything else.

Mm-hmm. . And you become more cleansed and connected. Better things in your life hesitate to use the word addicted because addicted connotates some of the, you know, alcohol and bad stuff. But it's good to be, have a habit and connected to the good things in life that help sustain us. And yes, that's what you're doing now and uh, seems like particularly what you're doing, Christine, and help me out here, and this is that you have a part of what you're doing, the new habits that you are, uh, also connecting to have to do with how.

Reaching out and being helpful to others to teach others from your experiences. You know, you've had a rough way to go, but others have a rough way to go too. And sometimes, when you have experiences as you've had, that gives you relevance, that gives you gravitas to speak to the lives of others and others.

may not have in their life. So tell me a little about what you're doing to be helpful to others. Uh, how'd this start for you? Let me know what you're doing here.

[00:03:38] Christine Malek:

I started several years ago when I got better. I got into being a business consultant, and all my clients there kept saying to me, You should be a coach.

You should be a coach, because I'm very motivational. I'm very positive. I've taken those negatives and turned it into a positive. When you look at a coin, there's always a heads and tails. So flip the coin. Which side do you want to be? So I started out being the A business consultant. Everybody kept saying, you know, be a coach.

I looked into it, and it was about halfway through taking a coaching course online that everything clicked. The whole, my whole life plan, the whole first 56 years of my life led up to this moment where I said, . It, it was a, it was a mind blow. It was just kind of like, talk about an aha moment. Mm-hmm.

Um, I was in a little one-on-one, but there were three of us and we were talking and going over a technique that we had learned from our coaches, you know, earlier. And something just clicked and I went, this is what I'm supposed to be. I'm not supposed to be a business coach.

Definitely found my purpose. And that's where my, my seven steps to SASSI, the first step is surrender. And that goes off the AA model because we need to say, Hey, you know what? I don't have all the answers, and even I don't have all the answers, which is why I still go to my coaches.

Step seven is to share the message and find somebody else you can help.

[00:05:23] Brad Miller:

Well unpack this SASSI model for us just a little bit more. If people connect with you, this is what they're going to learn, right? They're going to learn your SASSI model. I love that term.

But let's say there's a woman whom I have worked with in my ministry who may need what you have all about. If she goes to you, Christine, what's she going to find? What's she, what's she, what are you going to do for her? What are you going to be? How are you going to speak to her and be helpful in her life?

[00:05:54] Christine Malek:

Well, we're going to have a one-on-one. We're going to have a conversation. I'm going to find out where does she want to be? That's one of the things that I will discuss with every potential client is that every woman has the essence of SASSI. Okay, now SASSI is, again, the S A S S I, and it's all in uppercase. Some of those letters are lowercase; even though I'm assertive today with an uppercase, tomorrow or yesterday, I was a little lowercase.

[00:06:28] So we're going to have that conversation and find out where she is on the SASSI scale. We're going to talk, and we're going to find out where her assets are and what area was it squashed. You used the word suppressed earlier. How far down is it suppressed? We're going to have a conversation and see where she wants to go and where she wants to be.

[00:06:48] Brad Miller:

So becoming SASSI sounds like a bit of a journey with ebbs and flows and the ups and downs of any journey to becoming an SASSI woman in your model. It doesn't always mean you're brash and out there. It may mean you're also sensitive and have a tear once in a while and things like that. Is that fair?

[00:07:04] Christine Malek:

[00:07:04] Absolutely. I get that a lot, and that's where the assertive comes in. There's a difference between being aggressive and assertive; we don't always know that line. We don't always see that line. We may say we're independent, but are we independent?

What does that mean to a woman? Because they could be in a relationship, she could be married and still be independent. What does that independence look like to her?

[00:07:35] Brad Miller:

As you know, aggression doesn't always mean strengthened off as a big indicator of weakness, inability to focus and do things here, so that's awesome.

So tell me about somebody you've worked with in your SASSI program whom you've seen a change with. You've seen that something cool has happened here, and there has been a transformation because of what my program has offered.

[00:07:59] Christine Malek:

She'd extended past the Seven Steps of SASSI.

In the beginning, she fought very hard. She didn't know where she was. She couldn't accept who she was, the demons that were still inside her. We have to bring those out. For lack of better words, we must befriend or at least know them. What are those demons? I had my demons, without a doubt. The drugs and alcohol were demons.

[00:08:28] The rapes and abductions I went through were demons. But until I addressed those, I could not move forward. So with this woman, we were working towards, she's got the SASSI, she wants it. She's there. But now we're working farther and going through, and she's going there.

It's finally starting to little by little click. It depends on the woman. How quickly does she want to achieve that? How many demons are in the closet? How many skeletons are in the closet? I had one woman from Nigeria who DMed me one night.

She had seen my post but had not been a client as of yet. DMed me; it was late at night, and I always answer my phone when I see things like this, okay? She was on the verge of committing suicide, and she had two teenage children, and she felt she could not provide for them.

Obviously, Nigeria's a very African and a very tough country, a continent. I stayed with her on the phone for several hours, and we DMed back and forth. And the next morning, I told her to get some water and rest. I messaged her the next day. To this day, she still comments and thanks me because her life has completely turned around.

Women of abuse; we think we need a man in our life to give us our self-worth. But we don't. When we find that within us, and again, it goes back to that self-love when we can say, "you know what, I'm okay just the way I am. These are my flaws. These are my good sides. I'm okay. I'm even better than Okay. Just the, the way I am."

[00:10:24] Brad Miller:

[00:10:21] Your resource sounds like it's been a real helpful piece to help people realize that, to come to an aha moment of their own. That they are, have self-worth in their own right and don't need anyone else to Lord over them in any kind of way.

But then you have developed this community, and it sounds like, of other people who have gone through similar experiences.

[00:10:46] Christine Malek:

There's a private Facebook group I created that they can go in there because that is, again, one of my things is that we have to, we have to reach any woman that is in this situation, and it doesn't necessarily have to be abused. Let's communicate. Let's get the word out there. Let's help each other. We have to change this world one person at a time. Not just women, one person at a time. We have to change it. We can do better.

[00:11:17] Brad Miller:

You can do it better, so let's do it. So that's what you are all about. Christine Malek. If people want to avail themselves of what you are all about, how can people find you?

[00:11:25] Christine Malek:

www.SASSIcoach.com. Facebook, I'm on there as the SASSI Coach. Book a free call. That's the easiest thing to do. It's free. We take 30 minutes, 40 minutes, or whatever's needed.

We have that conversation. I have the seven steps to SASSI, but I also can do a one-to-one. I can do the group coaching wherever I think they'll fit best. That's what we do. But book the call. That's the easiest thing, the least effort. We have a conversation, and we take it from there.

[00:11:58] Brad Miller:

Her name is Christine Mallick. She is the SASSI coach helping women, especially women who have experienced abuse and domestic violence, and she's here to be helpful to you. And she's been our guest today in a very, uh, fascinating guest here on the Beyond Diversity Podcast with Dr. Brad Miller. Christine, thank you for being our guest today.

[00:12:17] Christine Malek:

[00:12:18] Thank you for having me, Brad.